I have been thinking a lot about what it means to “express” what
is on our minds or on our hearts. Express.
What does the word we use rather freely even really mean? I googled and discovered
this: convey (a thought or feeling) in words or by gestures and conduct. Expression is
defined as the process of making known
one's thoughts or feelings.
What of those who choose to express
very little? What of those that express way
too much? What if we do not feel comfortable expressing anything at all?
I don’t have to be told that I express too much – though I have
been told as much by others who are uncomfortable or bored with my expressions.
I have been told that my more emotional expressions are off-putting, that I can
be critical or angry or too syrupy or too loud or too much or too little or too
forward or …
Geesh! Give me a break! Why is it such a challenge to find someone
who allows me to express whatever (within
reason, mind you) - whatever is on my mind or heart without attempting to
challenge it, fix it or completely shut it down? Can we really be in a relationship with anyone who chooses not to express at all? Is it really a relationship when one expresses and the other remains silent?
But then I read this: “In a similar way, what we feel, think, and
experience is often inaudible until it’s expressed. The life of expression that
moves through us allows us to hear a larger harmony. When we ground what we
feel by touching another, the interwoven nature of things is amplified and
we’re brought closer to what matters.
"When we don’t give
voice to what moves through us, we become entangled with life, but not
connected to life. When silent with our love and pain, we can’t distribute what
we feel and so our heartaches and pains are intensified as they only bounce
around within us. The way a lightning rod standing in the open attracts and
grounds the lightning, the life of expression grounds the intensity of what we
feel on any given day.
"To practice the life
of expression enhances all the other practices, the way blood is needed for
each organ to do its work."
And I am emboldened.
And while my relationships may change and I no longer feel the
freedom to simply say or be or speak what is in my thoughts or on my heart, the
desire is still there – and maybe still there for all of us human beings who
have not shut off their own expressions due to fear or boredom - or the
inability to find someone who will simply listen.
The author suggests we keep trying, we keep looking, we search for
a larger harmony discovered when we can touch one another and be brought closer
to what really matters.
wrestling…
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